The Lessons That I Have Learned In 30 Years Of Marriage - Pastor Berry Dambaza Speaks (Part 5)

1. PREMARITAL COUNSELING IS CRITICALLY IMPORTANT: Sometimes people enter things that they do not adequately understand. This is why it is so important that those intending to get married are adequately counseled. Preparation is very important. No one runs in a race without going through preparation if they are serious about winning the race.

It seems in many countries it’s harder to get a driver’s license than to get a marriage certificate! In fact you are given a marriage certificate before you start the actual marriage! Everyone who competes in games goes into strict training (a) 1 Corinthians 9:25 ) The Amplified Bible). 

Premarital counseling should be done thoroughly yet we have at times seen people hurriedly going through premarital counseling. How one prepares for marriage determines the quality of that marriage. It is of great importance that this is done with the excellence it requires.

2. MARRIAGE IS NOT A HUNDRED METERS DASH,BUT A MARATHON: Right from the on set, this must be the mindset that parties to the marriage must enter marriage with.Marriage partners must not entertain any thoughts of divorce just in case things don’t work out. There must be a total commitment to each other that leaves no room for divorce in both parties to the marriage.

3. MARRY SOMEONE WHO IS A FRIEND INDEED: A good marriage is based on real friendship. Marriage must be entered with someone you can easily connect with. Someone that you can flow with without hustles.
The Lessons That I Have Learned In 30 Years Of Marriage - Pastor Berry Dambaza Speaks (Part 5)
Can two walk together, except they be agreed? (Amos 3:4) A strong friendship foundation is critically important for strong marriages. The need for God’s leading in these matters can not be overemphasized.

David finished talking to Saul. After that, Jonathan became David’s closest friend. He loved David as much as he loved himself(1 Samuel 18 GOD’S WORD Translation)

Although this talking of the love that Jonathan had for David, marriage partners aught to love each other as much as they love themselves! Marriages founded on such firm foundations last the distance.

4. IN MARRIAGE SYNERGIES FORMED ARE MEANT TO BRING INCREDIBLE RESULTS: Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labor(Ecclesiastes 4:9). The husband and wife team can produce much more than their individual output.


How should one chase a thousand, and two put ten thousand to flight, except their Rock had sold them, and the LORD had shut them up?(Deuteronomy 32:30).

We really need the Lord in our marriages in order for us to come out with incredible results. The context of marriage is meant to give an enabling environment for children where a couple is blessed with children.

5. ENJOY YOUR MARRIAGE: Marriage by its nature was designed for enjoyment and bliss. Yet for some people it can degenerate into a battlefield if we forget it was meant for our enjoyment. God gives us richly all things(including marriage) to enjoy. (1 Timothy 6:17). 

Marriage should be thoroughly enjoyed. Marital intimacy should warm the relationship. It’s like having fire in the fireplace. It warns the house. But marital infidelity is like putting fire on the carpet! The whole house might end up burnt with a lot of valuables destroyed! 

Marriage was meant to be enjoyed. Therefore enjoy it!


Berry Dambaza is a dynamic power packed preacher of the gospel with a life changing and life impacting ministry. He has been divinely endowed with a unique and powerful gift of ministering the Word of God that captivates listeners' attention.
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