"Bhuru Rinoonekwa Nemavanga, Varume Imbwa": 3 Reasons Why Men Cheat

A bull is a male of the cattle family. Many years ago in rural Africa, young shepherds pastoring the flock made bulls engage in fights. The notion was, real bulls are seen by the scars from the fights. That concept has been handed down t humans to mean that a real man should have scars. This is how H.I.V-A.I.D.S was once celebrated by a certain section of African men. Having the virus was seen as a sign, a scar of a real man. Greetings from Africa and the apostolic family here. Bishop Pride Sibiya with all my love.

By Bishop Pride Sibiya

That is one of the reasons why some men cheat. It's a cultural problem where male cheating is condoned while female cheating is condemned outrightly. Our culture is the first to inform men that cheating is bad but acceptable among men... and the sad thing is most of these notions are perpetuated by women on both men and other women. Here are some of the statements:

  • Varume imbwa ava (Men are dogs). Dogs are without shame and can have intimate relations with any dog as long as it is on heat!
  • Ndozvinoita varume (that is men's nature). If it is men's nature to cheat, that is what they do!
  • Varume havagone kurarama nemukadzi umwe (men cannot stay faithful to one woman)
"Bhuru Rinoonekwa Nemavanga, Varume Imbwa": 3 Reasons Why Men Cheat

Ladies, listen. Criticizing without learning will not help you. Your men are coming out of such a culture and need your help to step out of this. I am a Christian and will never "sanitize" cheating but please hear me. Men differ in their reasons for cheating but take these with you:

1. Lack of proper mentorship and fathering. Most men die earlier than their wives and many have left the boychild before they told taught them on being "husband material!" My father died when I was just in form 1. The other part of the boys grow up with their fathers but the fathers are involved in cheating and have lost any moral right to teach faithfulness. Many men do not go to church leaving them with ungodly mentorship: mukadzi anoda kutsvagirwa chimainini! Even in church, while women attend china, men either bunk theirs or braai in them!

2. Unmet needs. Men who do not have their 5 top needs met usually end up cheating. Here are the top 5 in their usual order of importance:
  • Se*ual need. Quality and quantity of the act while men want to feel that their ladies are fully enjoying and participating in the act. Hapana murume anoda kuone sekunga ariku-repa mukadzi!
  • Honour. Men are created with an ego, and such needs a lot of pampering. Murume anonyimwa sando anoyeverwa nemukadzi wekunze anomupa sando. Never let another woman praise your man more than you, mupe sando wobva watenga nezvipikiri zvacho!
  • Recreational companionship. Men need their women to be interested in what they are interested in. Don't let other women be inquisitive about your man's sport, gym, job, food et.al than you.
  • Physical attractiveness. Men are creatures of sight and really appreciate it when their wives improve their own physical appearance.
  • Admiration. Men want to feel that their women real admire them and think that they are great. Instead of being held in "home courts," men desire a deep sense of peace at home.
    "Bhuru Rinoonekwa Nemavanga, Varume Imbwa": 3 Reasons Why Men Cheat

3. Here are a few responses from men on my radio show with Mai Judah on Star F.M on why they cheat. Listen:
  • Once married, women take us for granted
  • Kungoroorwa munhu haachatode kugeza
  • Kudheerera murume nekuti anonamata or mufundisi.
  • Not being about my parents.
  • Kusiya zvese zvemumba kuna maid, maid anenge aatove mukadzi wangu!
  • Familiarity, vakadzi relax too much.
  • Haa, zvimwe tinenge tingori neruchiva

As I draw to a conclusion, guys no matter what your wife is or is not doing cheating is not right. You can choose to :
  • Communicate your needs.
  • Teach your wife what you need.
  • Find help and counselling for both of you from pastors and professional counsellors.
  • Improve your wife by buying her all necessary materials for such.
  • Show her infinite love, love her into submission.
Finally, cheating is: 
  • A personal decision
  • Wrong and bad
  • Adding more problems in your marriage
  • Breaking trust
  • Modelling and teaching your wife how to cheat, soon she will perfect the art and do more than what you are doing.
  • Sinning against God and your own body
  • Cheating is DEMONIC!

THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO LEGITIMATE REASON TO JUSTIFY CHEATING! Proverbs 6:32-33: "But a man who commits adultery has no sense; whoever does so destroys himself. Blows and disgrace are his lot, and his shame will never be wiped away."

Here's Bishop leaving you to discuss these points. Men, what do you say? Eavesdropping ladies, what is your view? Meet you again soon on air! Can I do one on why women cheat?

Have a wonderful and blessed day. Amen

Receive Jesus Christ today and go to church for spiritual fellowship.

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