Loving Someone Who Is Not Prepared |
Trying to get your other half to talk about the future is like trying to get Simon Cowell to wear anything besides a white shirt. Every time you bring it up, he changes the subject faster than you can blink. Ask yourself why this might be. Is he avoiding confrontation? If so, is it because afraid of saying the wrong thing because deep down he knows he’s never going to take the next step with you, share a mortgage with you, and/or marry you? Two words, girl: alarm bells.
Perhaps you’ve already put on your big-girl panties and confronted your BF about everything. Maybe you’ve expressed your feelings about wanting to get married or just taking the next step. However, there’s always a reason why the timing is off. “I’m busy at work at the moment” might be one excuse or “I need to save money right now” might be another. Either way, you’re being made to wait and it’s getting super frustrating
If he doesn’t plan to marry you in the end, he won’t go out of his way to spend time with your friends and family. In fact, he might even avoid events where he knows that they’ll be. If he does show up, he probably says very little and spends more time on his phone than chatting to people face-to-face. A guy who does plan to make you his wife will go above and beyond with your loved ones, especially if you’re close with them, because he realizes just how much they mean to you and that these people will be in his life just as much as yours in the coming years.
Similarly, a boyfriend who doesn’t plan to become a husband in a certain relationship will make zero effort to introduce you to his friends and family. He’ll do the bare minimum because he’ll want to keep his life separate from yours, knowing deep down that he’s not going to be with you in the long run.
A guy who’s head over heels for his GF and wants to make her his everything one day will also include her on his social media channels. Even if it’s just the odd photo on Instagram or the “In a Relationship” status on Facebook, there should be evidence of your strong bond somewhere online if his feelings run deep and he can’t imagine not being with anyone else ever. If there’s not some sort of sign that you exist, you have to ask yourself why. Is he not including you in his online life because he knows that someday you won’t exist in his offline life? Boy, bye.
Another sign that a guy might not commit to his girlfriend is that he can’t commit to her needs in the bedroom. I mean, it’s not unreasonable to want a 50/50 partner in all aspects of your relationship. If your boyfriend can’t give you that or doesn’t try his best to please you, it might be because he doesn’t think you’re going to be a long-term thing or the type of girl he wants to marry.
You’re always planning fun stuff that you guys can do together in the near future but he never does. In fact, maybe the only plans he ever makes is his weekly drinking session with his buddies on a Friday night. If he seems distant and it’s obvious that you’re not a priority in his life, it’s probably because he doesn’t see you as a priority—and if this is the case, he sure isn’t thinking about marriage.
The ultimate sign that he’s not going to marry you in the future if he’s pretty much told you that—or said that he never wants to get married in general. In this scenario, at least he’s being honest. But you’ve got to ask yourself whether you’re willing to sacrifice what you want for the sake of someone else. Sometimes, being in love isn’t enough. You need to be on the same page if you want your relationship to survive and thrive.
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Follow Apostle Pride Sibiya (Bishop: Glory Ministries) on Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, Periscope, WhatsApp, Google+, Instagram, Instaclips and all social media.
Follow Apostle Pride Sibiya (Bishop: Glory Ministries) on Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, Periscope, WhatsApp, Google+, Instagram, Instaclips and all social media.